Lao Zhi

Taiwanese Kung Fu Guy, A.K.A. The Man With No Staff


Pantheon: Celestial Bureaucracy
Patron: Sun Wukong

Lao Zhi was born in Taiwan to a single mother, Lao Bao Yu. The small, perhaps incomplete family did not have much, but they certainly had enough. The Lao family never went hungry. Most of Zhi’s problems were social. Although Bao Yu did her very best to teach Zhi right from wrong, he was constantly getting in trouble at school, and he often stole from the local stores and from other children. Besides, there was just something…different about the little boy. One day, Zhi stole a toy from one of the neighborhood bullies, who wasted no time in rounding up four of his friends and cornering little Zhi.

Three months later, the bullies came out of their collective comas. Their psychological therapy is on-going.

From that moment, Lao Bao Yu decided to have her son trained in the martial arts. The great strength and raw talent Zhi displayed had to be honed and controlled for the sake of those around him. Besides, a little discipline would do the boy good.

As it turned out, this was a turning point in Lao Zhi’s life. Learning at a rapid rate, Zhi mastered three different styles by the time he was ten. By the age of 13, Lao Zhi was quickly becoming a legend among the martial artists of Taiwan, and had already landed minor roles in a few Wuxia films. While pursuing Kung Fu mastery, and what seemed to be a budding career in the film industry, Lao Zhi didn’t have nearly enough time to steal and get up to other kinds of mischief, which was just fine as far as his mother was concerned. Zhi felt as though he was on top of the world.


One day, when Lao Zhi was sixteen, he arrived home from his training to find the front door wide open. Immediately sensing that something was wrong, the boy ran into the house, seeking an intruder. Instead, he found his mother standing by the back door with a peculiar expression on her face. “What’s wrong?” asked Zhi. “Nothing…” said Bao Yu as she opened the back door, “There’s someone you need to meet.”

As Lao Zhi walked passed his mother into the backyard, he could have sworn he heard his mother mumble, “…Don’t care what that jerk says…He forgot.”

Lao Zhi found a man wrapped in a long cloak in his backyard. Lao didn’t notice much else because the man was holding a magnificent staff. “Here!” cried the man as he tossed the staff to Zhi. The boy marveled at the weapon until he realized that the stranger had pulled out an even more amazing staff and had taken a fighting stance. Knowing a challenge when he saw one, Zhi wasted no time, but leapt to the attack. He quickly realized, however, that this was battle he could never win, not in a hundred lifetimes. Never before in his short life had Lao Zhi been so utterly outclassed. After an intense 13 seconds, the boy had been disarmed and knocked down.

“Who are you?” said an over-awed Zhi.
“I am Sun Wukong,” said the man as he cast off his cloak. “And I am your father!”
“…That’s pretty clichéd you know.”
“I know, but I’ve wanted to use that line for a while now.”
“So you’re really my father?”
“Yes. I have some things to tell you, and some gifts to give you.”

For the next several hours, the father and son talked.

“You’re awesome!” exclaimed Zhi.
“Indeed I am, son,” confirmed the Monkey King, “Now go forth and be awesome in my name!”

Lao Zhi then proceeded to…well…be awesome. He became the most well respected stuntman in Chinese martial arts cinema, eventually becoming the top secret stunt-double for Jet Li. Lao also became well respected in the martial arts community at large, invited to many schools and dojos to share his knowledge.

It was on one of these trips, one which took him to Penn State University, that Lao Zhi met a young kendoka named Shiro. Shiro realized that Lao Zhi was also a scion and invited him to the Pride of Nittany. Zhi, sensing yet another opportunity to be awesome, accepted the invitation.

Lao Zhi

Scion:Lions of War BeowulfDW